Monday, February 9, 2009

Valentine sms, Valentine cellphone forwards, Best lines for valentine's day

"...when one loves, one never lacks words."



"You don't have to worry about what clothes to wear when you're with me.
You'd look best just wearing the smile on your face."

"Want to dance?" (No, thank you.) "Don't thank me, thank God someone asked you!"

"Are you free tonight, or will it cost me?"


"I think I'm dying." (Why?) "Because I'm looking at heaven."

"Sorry, I don't date outside my species."

(Excuse me, do you have the time?) "Do you have the energy?"

"Do you have a map? Because I just got lost in your eyes!"

"If I had 11 roses and you, I would have a dozen."

"Hey baby, want to see something swell?"

"You are my queen of hearts that I will forever hold in my hand.....even after the game is over."

"Your daddy must work at a juice factory, because your so very fine."

"I have reason to believe you're carrying an illegal weapon." (Why?)

"Because your ass is lethal!"

"You remind me of bacon, the way you sizzle"

"If you were a burger at McDonalds, I'd call you McBeautyfull"

(Haven't we met before?) "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."

(So, what do you do for a living?) "Female impersonator."

(Hey baby, where have you been all my life?) "For the first half of it, I probably wasn't born yet."

"Are you religious? Because I'm the answer to all your prayers!"

"You know, the more I drink, the prettier you get!"

"Is there an airport nearby, or is that just my heart taking off?"

"My friend and I have a bet that you won't take off your blouse in public."

"Hey baby, do you want to go behind that rock and get a little boulder?"

"Your Dad must be a drug dealer, because you're dope!"

"Excuse me miss, is your dress felt? Would you like it to be?"

"Can I see your tan lines?

"You know, beauty is only a light switch away."

"Would you like to dance? (No.) "I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me. I said, you look fat in those pants."

"If I followed you home, would you keep me?"

"You're as sweet as Hershey's chocolate, and speaking of Hershey's, how about a kiss?

"Your Dad must be a baker,'cause you've got nice buns!"

"Why don't you sit on my lap and we'll see what pops up?"

"You know what looks good on you? (What?) Me."

"Do you work at Kentucky Fried Chicken?" (Why?) "Because you're finger lickin' good!"

"If my right leg was Thanksgiving, and my left leg was Christmas, would you visit me between the holidays?"

"Lets add you and me, subtract our clothes, divide our legs and multiply."

"Nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?"

"I'm feeling a little overdressed, wanna get naked?"

"Can I have directions?" (To where?) "Your heart, because I keep getting lost in your eyes."

"You don't like me do you? Well, you know what they say, opposites attract!"

"Hey, why did you trip me?" (I didn't.) "Then how come I fell in love when you walked by?"

(Where have you been all my life?) "What life?"

(Do you have a boyfriend?) "If I said yes, would you leave me alone?"

"Does your watch have a second hand? I want you to tell me how long it took for me to fall in love with you."

"With that body, I hope you have a license to kill!"

"Hello my name is (your name) but you can call me tonight."

"Is your father a mechanic? Because you have such a finely tuned body!"

"Your lips are like wine and tonight I want to get drunk."

"I know how to please a woman." "Then please leave me alone."

"Hey, baby, what's your sign?" "Do not enter."

"Haven't I seen you someplace before?" "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

"If I follow you around like a lost puppy would you take me home?"

"Did you know your body is 80 percent water, and I'm thirsty."

You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear.

"Are you single?" (yes) "Not anymore."

"Is your father a terrorist? Because you're the bomb."

" If I told you I was a tent, would you put me up for the night?"

"Hey, You have something on your lips." (What?) "Me!"

"I couldn't help but notice you undressing me from across the room."

"Honey, your so sweet, you're giving me a toothache."

"No wonder the sky is gray today, all the blue is in your eyes."

"If I could but live as one of your tears- to be born of your eyes, to live on your cheek, and to die on your lips."

"If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I'd walk through a garden forever."

If I told you that you have a great body would you hold it against me?

"I may not be Dairy Queen, but I'll treat you right"

Dip your finger in your drink then wipe a little of it on a person's shirt and say "How about you and I go back to my place and change out of these wet clothes"

"How has your day been?" (answer...fine) "I asked you how your day was, not how you look."

"As long as you are here, would you mind helping me burp the air out of my water bed?"

"Would you like to come over tonight for breakfast?"

"You have a great smile. Too bad that's not all you're wearing."

I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

"My face is leaving in ten minutes. Be on it."

"The only reason I'd kick you out of my bed would be to make love to you on the floor."

"Screw me if I'm wrong... But I think you want to kiss me!!"

"How do you want your eggs in the morning? How about fertilized?"

"I'm sorry, I'm new in town... Could you please give me directions to your place."

"My name isn't Fred Flintstone, But I can sure make your Bedrock"

"Look at you with all them curves and me with no brakes"

"I want to melt in your mouth not in your hands. "

"Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway."

"Is it hot in here or is it just you?"

"Do you believe in Love at first sight or do I have to walk by again?"

"I want to ride you like a Harley on a bumpy stretch of road."

"Do your feet hurt? (Why?) "Because you've been running through my mind all day."

"If I was in charge of organizing the alphabet, I'd put 'U' and 'I' next to each other."

"Is your dad a pitcher? Because he threw you some nice curves."

Start feeling the back of her shirt's neckline and when she asks what you are doing say, "looking for the tag that says made in heaven."

"Hey, you ever do the naked pretzel?" "Sit on my magic lap, and watch it rise."

"Do you know what an Australian kiss is?" (No) "Kind of like a french kiss, but down under!"

"Who stole the stars and put them in your eyes?"

"Got a name? Or shall I call you mine?"

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

they are all so cute! <3

Anonymous said...

Omg these are soo funny haha some of them are cute but most of them r dirty but still they r good ones