The Chemical element WO+

 

Element: Woman

Symbol: WO+

Discoverer: Adam Edenwarden

Atomic mass: Accepted as 53.6 kg, isotopes vary from

40 - 200 kg

Occurrence: Copious quantities in all urban areas

 

 

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:

1. Surface usually covered with thin film of make-up.

2. Boils at room temperature.

3. Freezes without any known reason.

4. Melts if given special treatment.

5. Bitter if incorrectly used.

 

 

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:

1. Have great affinity for gold, silver and a range of

precious

stones and absorbs great quantities of expensive

substances.

2. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and

for no known

reason.

3. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

 

 

COMMON USES:

1. Highly ornamental, especially in social gatherings.

2. Can be a great aid to relaxation.

 

TESTS:

1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when happy.

2. Turns pale green when placed beside a better

specimen.

 

 

POTENTIAL HAZARDS:

1. Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.

2. Illegal to posses more than one, although several

can be

maintained at different locations as long as specimens

do not come

into direct contact with each other

 

 

WARNING!!!!

PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO THIS ELEMENT CAN CAUSE SEVERE

FINANCIAL

HEMORRHAGING AND MENTAL DISTRESS.

 

BE CAUTIOUS !