You Know You Work for the Government If...

- When someone asks about what you do for a living, you lie.

- You get really excited about a 2% pay raise.

- Your biggest loss from a system crash is you lose your best jokes.

- Your supervisor doesn't have the ability to do your job.

- You sit in a cubicle smaller than your bedroom closet.

- It no longer amazes you that computer security is more important than having computers.

- Your office computer was just upgraded to a 200 MHz Pentium this year.

- Computer specialists know less about computers than your teenager.

- Lunch is like another scheduled meeting, only shorter.

- You and your coequals always consume the free food left over from VIP meetings.

- It's dark when you drive to and from work.

- You're forced to park your car a mile from the office because of all the commanders, customers, designated contractor, VIP's, employees of the month/quarter/year and visitor, parking spaces by the main entrance.