Crossing the Language Barrier

Read This Out Loud!!!

I dare you to try!

To get the full effect, this should be read aloud. You will understand what 'tenjewberrymuds' means by the end of the conversation. This has been nominated for the best email of 2005.

The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service, at a hotel in Asia, which was recorded and published.

Room Service (RS) : "Morrin. ; Roon sirbees."

Guest (G) : "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service."

RS : "Rye..Roon sirbees..morrin! Jewish to oddor
sunteen??"

G : "Uh..yes..I'd like some bacon and eggs."

RS : "Ow July den?"

G : "What??"

RS : "Ow July den?...pryed, boyud, poochd?"

G : "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled please."

RS : "Ow July dee baykem? Crease?"

G : "Crisp will be fine."

RS : "Hokay. An Sahn toes?"

G : "What?"

RS : "An toes. July Sahn toes?"

G : "I don't think so."

RS : "No? Judo wan sahn toes??"

G : "I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo wan sahn toes' means."

RS : "Toes! toes!...Why jew don juan toes? Ow bow Anglish moppin we bodder?"

G : "English muffin!! I've got it! You were saying 'Toast.' Fine. Yes, an English muffin will be fine."

RS : "We bodder?"

G : "No...just put the bodder on the side."

RS : "Wad! ?"

G : "I mean butter...just put it on the side."

RS : "Copy?"

G : "Excuse me?"

RS : "Copy...tea...meel?"

G : "Yes. Coffee, please, and that's all."

RS : "One Minnie. Scramah egg, crease baykem, Anglish moppin we bodder on sigh and copy.... rye??"

G : "Whatever you say."

RS : "Tenjewberrymuds."

G : "You're very welcome."

Cell Phones are Evil

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Animals that even a veggie doesn't mind eating

Darling...Go Ahead....!!!!

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club.
A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands free
speaker-function and begins to talk.

Everyone else in the room stops to listen.

MAN: "Hello."

WOMAN: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"

MAN: "Yes."

WOMAN: "I am at the shops now and found this beautiful leather coat. It's
only £1,000. Is it OK if I buy it?"

MAN: "Sure, go ahead if you like it that much."

WOMAN: "I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new 2006
models. I saw one I really liked."

MAN: "How much?"

WOMAN: "£45,000."

MAN: "OK, but for that price, I want it with all the options."

WOMAN: "Great! Oh, and one more thing .....the house I wanted last year is
back on the market. They're asking £450,000."

MAN: "Well, then go ahead and give them an offer of £400,000. They will
probably take it. If not, we can go the extra 50 thousand. It is really a
pretty good price."

WOMAN: "OK. I'll see you later! I love you so much!!"

MAN: "Bye! I love you, too."

The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room are staring at him in
astonishment, mouths agape.....

Then he smiles and asks: "Anyone know's who this phone belongs to?"

One Seater Open Helicopter

And Oh that's a deadlock...

Boss said to secretary: For a week we will go abroad,
so make arrangement.

Secretary make call to Husband: For a week my boss and
I will be going abroad, you look after yourself.

Husband make call to secret lover: My wife is going
abroad for a week, so lets spend the week together.

Secret lover make call to small boy whom she is giving
private tution: I have work for a week, so you need
not come for class.

Small boy make call to his grandfather: Grandpa, for a
week I don't have class 'coz my teacher is busy. Lets
spend the week together.

Grandpa(the 1st boss ;) ) make call to his secretary: This week I am
spending my time with my grandson. We cannot attend
that meeting.

Secretary make call to her husband: This week my boss
has some work, we cancelled our trip.

Husband make call to secret lover: We cannot spend
this week together, my wife has cancelled her trip.

Secret lover make call to small boy whom she is giving
private tution: This week we will have class as usual.

Small boy make call to his grandfather: Grandpa, my
teacher said this week I have to attend class. Sorry I
can't give you company.

Grandpa make call to his secretary: Don't worry this
week we will attend that meeting, so make arrangement .

This is called dead lock.

Watch out: Cats on the Prowl

Men Vs Women

- A man will pay $2.00 for a $1.00 item he needs.

- A woman will pay $1.00 for a $2.00 item that she does not need.

- A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

- A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

- A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

- A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

- To be happy with a man, you must love him a little and understand him a lot.

- To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

- Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

- Women somehow deteriorate overnight.

- A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

- A man marries a woman expecting she won't change, but she does.

- Married men live longer than single men, but married men are more willing to die.

- Any married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing.

- A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument

Curiosity killed the cat

Should have worn his Gas Mask :P

Tropical Islands of Fiji

The Republic of the Fiji Islands, or Fiji, is an island nation in the South Pacific Ocean, east of Vanuatu, west of Tonga and south of Tuvalu. The country occupies an archipelago with two sizable islands, Viti Levu and Vanua Levu, where the majority of inhabitants live, and is joined by over eight hundred islands, with about one hundred regularly inhabited. The name Fiji is the old Tongan word for the islands, which is turn derived from the Fijian name Viti.



Fiji consists of 322 islands, of which about one third are inhabited. The two most important islands are Viti Levu and Vanua Levu. Viti Levu hosts the capital city of Suva, and is home to nearly three quarters of the population. The islands are mountainous, with peaks up to 1200 m, and covered with tropical forests. Other important towns include Nadi, (location of the international airport) as well as Labasa, Lautoka, and Savusavu. Other islands and island groups include Taveuni and Kadavu (the third and fourth largest islands respectively, the Mamanuca Group (just outside Nadi) and Yasawa Group, which are popular tourist destinations, the Lomaiviti Group, outside of Suva, and the remote Lau Group.

Birth of a sea Turtle

Beer Cans Art